Hello New Earthers ^_^
This is the dream that keeps coming back… never too far from my most immediate thoughts… always in flux, adapting and evolving… I visualise this life of freedom we are moving towards daily.
I am 34 years of age, vegan, female, Aquarius, and I am a self-employed clairvoyant medium living in Stockport in Cheshire, UK.
I have longed to be reunited with the natural world since childhood, and the more I evolve, the more systemic trauma I transmute and transcend, the more claustrophobic the frequency of the grid gets for me.
The yearning for the wilderness, for the timelessness and non-linear freedom of living in harmony with nature, in total harmony with synchronicity and spirit, has reached that tipping point in me. Everything I have spent so long developing and transmuting in myself is now bursting forth to leap into the physical :)
At this juncture, every dealing with the institutions and systems of the grid, only validates the determination that so many of us have in achieving this ideal.
I know that the way to save this earth is to become one with her again. The suffering we have lived through and observed in the on-grid paradigm has shown us that our way of life in this modern era is not sustainable and our moving off the grid in droves is the blossoming manifestation of our new shared reality.
For the last 7 years I have been rediscovering myself, the world and the universe. I found light and truth in the darkest of spaces within myself. The wisdom of suffering was burgeoning within me. My spiritual power had awakened; activated out of dormancy and transformed in an instant by an inner/outer body experience which shook and dissolved every foundation I had ever built. That single touch of the celestial world transformed my universe. Everything I thought I knew about life no longer applied. My atheist belief systems were shattered all at once through equilibrium-shaking experience which confirmed to me the truth of a different but perfectly intertwined reality. One I had hoped for, but had shut out since childhood. I was now consciously and with full intent, walking through two worlds at once.
As I grew… as I remembered myself, I worked intentionally to release the tentacles of resistance I had been growing unconsciously throughout my lifetime. My lived experience has now come full circle. This last month has once more taken me back to my childhood; all the way back to the social injustices I lived through as a child, and how those injustices served to be the foundation for further injustices on an already marginalised family. I saw how my mum’s inherent abilities to see beyond the physical constructs were demonised, stigmatised and categorised as illness by the medical and religious institutions. Instead of being recognised as an awakening medium – she was boxed away neatly into the category of ‘Schizophrenic’ and Bi-polar’. Her vivid prophetic ability was dismissed as hallucination, despite those “hallucinations” becoming manifest not long after her inner eye showed those things to her.
She did not have the metaphysicaltools or the community of seers and feelers; she did not have a network like ours in which we were able to develop and use our newly awakened languages of the soul together and She internalised the tragic experiences she had seen in the spiritual world and blamed herself for those things. She was shuffled through the pathological system of psychiatry – medicated and compartmentalised inside herself and away from her soul expressions which had a disastrous effect on her and an equally devastating effect on our childhoods. Medicating a seer into submission is of the old paradigm. I now know I lived both sides; through pure childhood eyes and through adult eyes so I could be an agent of transformation in the areas that had created trauma in me.
Living through the paradigm of pharmaceuticals and their impact on my mum, I saw how the psychiatric path did not work for her and continues to be an outdated solution for those like her. It effectively served to diminish her light, her soul truths – her potential. Medicating away profound mystical experiences because they are inaccurately categorised as illnesses has for too long created a type of gagging culture in which seers , energy workers, empaths, and feelers of all kinds, are being misdiagnosed under the guise of various conditions. By living through the various angles of this problem, I was able to see what was missing from traditional mental health care and what is really possible. I saw the incredible effects of the holistic mindful alternatives to pharmaceuticals, and why those alternatives are more suitable for those going through spiritual crisis, who simply need the support, not the judgement or the stigma, and the tools for them to balance their own internal infernos.
I saw my mum being taken from us against her will and into the mental health service under the mental health act. This created unnecessary trauma to us as children and to her as a sovereign being. The act directly impinges upon the rights of those who society misunderstands, as well as creating unnecessary suffering and fear for the families affected by this. Based upon my experiences of the MHA, I found it further marginalised us as an already disadvantaged family. An offer of help should never be enforced against anyone’s will as freewill is a universal principle. We cannot force help on people because of course then it stops being genuine help. When help is mandatory and enforced, it morphs into control, which of course, is a toxic dynamic for anyone to live through.
After she was put into the MHS, we went into child services to a foster home. I started my first menstruation cycle there at age 11 and without my mothership to carry me through that experience and starting high school was a dark period. (no pun intended!) I experienced states of deep depression before I even turned 10.
Starting high school and entering into adolescence without her encouragement affected me deeply. Affected is an understatement. It blew my soul to pieces. In fact, those care homes are where I had to retrieve some of my soul parts when I began to consciously work on my childhood traumas in meditation.
When we finally got her back she was not her whole self. I felt it instinctively. A barrier. A cloud. A smog.
There was a palpable but invisible distance between her soul and mine. She was in many ways emotionally numb with all of the medications in her system. Our organic, biological vehicles are not made for this level of chemical warfare. They acted like walls between her and her emotional self. Equally and inevitably, they became walls to us and our emotional selves. She remained on those drugs for the rest of her life and never actualised her truth or reclaimed her place as the natural mystic she was.
In her death she passed this incomplete soul expression of hers to me to actualise. Instantly I was sparked. Activated. Initiated into an entirely new vista of what was now impossibly possible and suddenly, with the right tools and techniques, were now so easy to achieve. I had been awakened from the slumber of working against myself, against my natural expressions of soul. After a lifetime of struggling against an invisible, systemic tide, I was now experiencing the exact polar dimension of being carried effortlessly towards destiny.
I delved into the cavernous pools of anyone who would let me! I wanted to understand everything.. to study souls and their blueprints through this language of the Universal mind I had recovered. I wanted to understand the emotions that lay behind the various maladies of physical/mental/spiritual and emotional traumas that make up the collective realities of our societies. I looked into the relationships of those struggling in love, finding that the suppression of their own internal archetypal energies were manifesting and bleeding through from the spiritual into the physical reality and into their relationships. I began to understand the connections that were linking people together – and I saw the undercurrent of resonant thought that was flowing through everything linking like minds together in synchronicity and gravitational pull. I saw all the elements before me; the fire, the water, the air and the earth. I saw how each was perfectly intertwined with the next.
A picture was forming in my mind. A picture of how inequality came to be. I finally understood why there was so much suffering and destruction on the earth. I saw so many women who were blocking out their masculine expressions of self. Suppressing their own abilities to create and build upon foundations on the physical plane. For many, this non-confidence in our ability to create for ourselves, became financial co-dependency on a male or males in our lives. In similar fashion, seeing the men who were suppressing their inner feminine principles of expression such as emotion and intuition, showed me why those aspects have been suppressed in the greater world at large. And thus, we have femicides happening on the daily. Our beautiful planet is being destroyed. Exterminating the feminine principles inside themselves has helped add to the reality of women being exterminated on the outside.
I could see how emotions and manifestations of spirit were being labelled and categorised as illnesses to be medicated and suppressed as opposed to being embraced and used for the benefit of our world. I saw that everything was feeding into itself in a loop de loop of causes and their effects.
As my journey progressed, I read those who had been labelled autistic and began to familiarise myself with the energies behind those spectrums.. the emotional worlds within the conditions. I saw how inequality was being created and fed and how this all came back full circle to how individuals were suppressing certain emotions and experiences within themselves.
As I continued to develop my senses, I became aware of how so many elements of our society are not conducive to high levels of wellbeing. I saw so many injustices, each with alarmingly simple solutions but solutions that were not yet in play. I wondered why they were not in play. But equally I understood that we were creating that paradigm with our own thoughts: we were magnetising and galvanising certain thoughts with our emotional energies which in turn magnetised and galvanised realities we did not consciously want. I understood the true power of our thoughts and how they each fed back into our intertwined realities to create the whole canvas; each of our own unique brushstrokes creating and maintaining the realities we were living through.
For a long time, we were trying to tweak the systems that were not working, from within those systems as opposed to creating new solutions outside of those systems which better answered the screams of individuals in society. I wondered why whole-person solutions were not being provided and implemented. If they were, why were they were so slow to manifest? I have forever questioned why the destruction of earth, the animals and each other has been condoned and accepted for so long. I wondered why those in positions of power were in those positions and why they were so easily led away from their inner harmony and were instead authorising the destruction of life in exchange for further power and material wealth. Why were we choosing to live in a dog-eat-dog model of society which would always put profit and GDP before people and their wellbeing? I observed a hamster wheel system of capitalism that did not serve the greater majority.
There has always been a minority of those who are more in favour of serving themselves, their egoic selves, than in serving the greater good of all.
When we look beyond the material into the subatomic, it is easier and easier to see the very obvious answer to all these things. Grabbing at the material things in life creates stress and ill mental health. Aligning with our inner expressions of soul creates existential ecstasy.
I’m ready to begin to move away from capitalism and into the new earth of socialism we have been birthing .
Asylums. Widespread abuse. Water torture. Electrical Shocks. Lobotomies. Straight Jackets.Clinical and intimidating Mental Wards. Excessive use of restraint and force. Stigma. Numbness.Those who are in the spectrum of autism left in isolation on wards. Forced medication.
These methods are archaic and inherently abusive.
The mental health system has long needed transformation. It does not meet the needs of those who are aware of their spiritual energies but are struggling to integrate the experiences they are having into a paradigm that refuses to recognise them. When the medical world labels those who are having legitimate and profound mystical experiences triggered by the activation of kundalini, those who are labelled can become lost in the system without ever achieving true inner healing. Many are systemically brainwashed to believe that their abilities are merely insanity, so conditioned are they against themselves that they begin to believe the constant feed of dogma that seeks to explain away their experiences as fantasy. It is like placing a plaster over a bullet wound.
These forms of psychological abuse create havoc internally to those confused and unable to understand what is happening to them. Those like my mum, who were permanently medicated – struggled to access their suppressed emotions; a state of being which is entirely counter intuitive to the process of healing. Healing requires the assimilation of our emotions. If we cannot access our emotions, we are stacking a tower that will eventually need to topple in a more destructive manner than was necessary.
Feeling is the key to healing. Understanding ourselves and our emotional worlds is the more compassionate and conscious path to healing ourselves.
This has been crystallising and coming into focus for my entire life. After the experiences I lived , the deeper meaning to all I was discovering was coming into clarity. There was a truth unfolding, blossoming away under the surface of my conscious mind.
This last 7 years of exploration into the universal mind has solved my inner puzzlement. I was everywhere, in everything, doing love readings, Medical Intuition, psychic detection, life path, animal totem, dream analysis, tarot work. I delved into those just starting their journeys and those who had been consciously present for far longer than I. I connected with those who had lived through a litany of medical problems, or mental distress and those who had never had any physical or mental hardship. I went into the homes of abused women, living in fear of their partners, but who felt trapped with no financial means of their own to pick up and leave. I was being flooded in waters of human suffering. Now I understand the last 7 years was answering my life long questions. “Why is there so much suffering on the earth?” “How do we alleviate the suffering?”
A few years after registering the business and going self-employed, I found that I could not conform to the requirements of a wholly capitalistic system without trampling over my moral code. How could I serve those who most needed help but still make a living? I never want to turn away those who are feeling the brunt of the poverty regime, and yet I also needed to be nourished and fed myself in order to sustain myself and to continue the work.
After much soul searching on this issue, the ends have finally come together. The arc of exploration has, after 7 years, presented the next step of the path to soul purpose.
I now know why some time ago I began to grow fatigued in some aspects of the work. I was no longer enjoying the sessions I was doing that revolved entirely around love, marriage or babies. One lady even messaged me to ask me for the winning lottery numbers..
Yup. I was growing weary.
I learned profoundly from all the sessions and yet I knew that window had somehow closed. I was now feeling the call to hone in on the area of work in which I was most aligned with. The more deeply fractured or turned away from themselves a readee was, the more shadow beings or screaming voices they were being impacted by, the deeper levels of joy and pure fulfilment I felt from seeing them put those tools to use to experience true transformational healing from within. What I had learned and had used for myself, was working for others!
The heart sings at the recognition that all the suffering I went through has formed a doorway to an alternate reality for others going through similar. I could not have seen what works, if I had never lived through the suffering of what didn’t work. Whoever said we cannot change the past, maybe did not understand that life is not linear and the past is also ahead of us. A consequence of healing deep trauma within myself without psychiatry and without chemicals was being able to pass those tools onto others in ways that are not available through traditional mental health delivery services.
We have lamented the state of the systems which are in place and we have spoken excitedly deep into the witching hours about how those things could be transformed into solutions that do not create further suffering. We have bemoaned the profit-before-people model of business we have seen at the core of the destruction of our beautiful earthship. We have yearned for the day when we could do what we love, for whoever needs it, without edging anyone out financially, but still being able to eat!
There has been a new dimension emerging under my feet without my being entirely aware of it. It was as though I was on hold from receiving the information until I had purged through the bulk of my remaining blocks. I discovered the Social Enterprise model and how it is more of a bridge between pure charity and pure capitalism. It is people before profit, but you are still able to make profit, but the majority of the profits go back into the enterprise or the cause it is serving in the community.
Because it is not a charity you are not bound to the bureaucracy of the charity commission nor bound to receiving government grants or donations, which, of course would be defeating the aim of removing dependence on governance and state.
The most beautiful thing I am witnessing about the tragedies of the austerity regime, is that the communities impacted by the regime, are pulling together to provide the creative solutions that society needs most. We are uniting to counter the effects of a common .. I don’t want to say “enemy”, but… you know! There is always a catalyst to change and our government has been one major catalyst over this last decade.
I came up against all the legal structures and the rules of setting up a social enterprise and I questioned whether the thing I am dreaming actually exists yet. I merely want to do the work I was born to do, without interference from government entities, whilst helping people and living in an evolved community in the wilderness.
I envision an off-grid community of healers, mediums, sensitives, artists, writers etc, and as well as being our home I see it as a place for spiritual rejuvenation for those going through spiritual crisis who otherwise, (without accessible options for deep soul healing) may end up in the system, possibly lost for a lifetime. I do not feel that current mental/emotional health offerings; concrete clinical buildings on tarmacked streets are truly appropriate for those who are disconnected from their true selves and from the natural world. Healers are very sensitive to the constant bombardment of electrical waves sparking through the air and around their heads all the time and coming to a healing sanctuary for even a short time would do much for their spiritual healing process <3 We have a society of humans who are struggling to hear themselves over the constant static. Much of our human suffering comes from being disconnected to the natural world which follows on to not being connected to ourselves.
The Sanctuary will grow organic fruit and veg which will sustain the sanctuary’s food needs. Fully vegan of course and eco friendly. There will be meditations, Soul art therapy, one to ones, group development, Yoga, Fire release ceremonies, sharing dreams by the fire-pit – Deep soul-working through troubling archetypes a person may be struggling to assimilate. This is our Eden. Our Shambhala. Our inner Earth. Our Summerlands.
Of course this is only in existence on the spiritual plane right now and I still need to connect with the tribe I will do this with :) And research how to acquire land etc.. I’m at square one with this. Zero funds as yet. I am currently working on my first book and designing my first tarot and both will become profit streams I can use to funnel back into bringing this vision to life as well as the sessions I receive from here on out. <3
If this community resonates as a vibrational match, and you have been dreaming of similar, please do contact me and let us begin to connect any remaining dots :) <3
I am flexible about where this happens in the UK.
Looking for other Indigos, seeds, empaths etc who are committed to ending the suffering of others in every form (vegan resonance ~ thank you )
Thanks for taking the time! :)
(ps sorry about the length! :D )
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