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Home Forums General Discussion Spouse and I want different lives… Do I leave or stay???

This topic contains 2 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  amberi 3 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #59303

    amberi
    Participant

    I don’t know what to do. In the past 2 years I have really changed; I’ve learned a lot and I’ve realized there is a whole world out there living a different way than what we know life to be. I’ve worked hard to change the way I eat, following a healthy whole foods lifestyle– which is extremely hard where we live b/c the most important foods I want are not easy to access (raw milk). I’ve also been working on getting rid of the accumulation of “things” we have acquired as I have such a desire to live a more simple, fulfilled life. “Things” have become overwhelming to me and we don’t need it. I don’t have much or any family, my husband’s family is basically non-existent in our lives. And I just want more out of life. I want to leave this life and start a new experience, start fresh and live the life I want to live vs. the life I was given/born into thinking that this is just the way things are. I don’t want to live a life where all you do is work your butt off to pay bills then come out still broke at the end of it. I want to enjoy life, as well as work hard, but work in a different way- not being controlled by someone else. I am willing to “sacrifice” and give up some things in order to really feel fulfilled and happy. I want to have my priorities straight and I want to home school my son and teach him that he has options in life and can choose his path.

    My husband is miserable as well, hates his job. He works  hard, comes home tired, doesn’t really get much joy out of anything. He agrees that the way life is is b.s. but apparently he is just willing to accept it and doesn’t want to do anything to change it. He’s not willing to sacrifice or live a “smaller” life in order to come out better in the end. I’ve been trying to convince him to try the tiny house life for a year or two just to get caught up on debt and he doesn’t want to do that. I don’t see a way out. I see an unsatisfying life ahead. I see my son destined to live the same kind of mundane, pointless life- he’ll be used to it. I want more for him and more for me.

    Sorry this is so long, I would just like to know if anyone has any similar experience to share, or thoughts on what is the right thing to do. I’m not worried about custody issues at this point, just experiences outside of that– as far as is it better to go and try to give my son the best life possible and give him a happy mother, or do I have to stay and “fake it” in this life to keep the family together- mind you living a life where we can’t afford to do anything, we have no family in our lives, or friends for that matter. I would just love to live off-grid or not completely off-grid but closer to the lifestyle– granted I don’t know how to do this, other than a tiny home idea but I am willing to try and learn! I would love to have friends in this community who get it, because where I’m at, no one does! Thank you for any thoughts…

    #59304

    steverobertson
    Participant

    I’ve been off grid (off and on) for over 35 years.  I downsized not by choice, but because the farm I had burned to the ground in a wildfire.  I had no insurance, and had to start over completely from scratch and AFTER I had already retired.  My wife and I share many of our experiences off grid, and I have a how-to channel dedicated to finding ways to live off grid on a tight budget.  So rather than me typing a long dissertation about my experiences, you can just watch (which is more fun anyway).  After watching a few videos, we’ll feel like family to you and we’re helping three different families come to the mountain and live off grid that you can follow as well.  If you feel that Colorado is your choice of living, we can help you directly.  Here are our three channels:

    https://www.youtube.com/user/steverrobertson

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWZEYhrRqTostSRaqL05C0w

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaFOntKZIcEoqUqg1B9z4xg

    #59305

    amberi
    Participant

    Wow, Steve! Just watched Part 1 & 2 of your videos of “Your Story”… You seem exactly like the kind of people we’ve been looking for. It’s clear you have a kind heart. And I love your place and the environment/neighbors you’ve got there in Colorado, and it’s beautiful! Watching your videos, just thinking to myself – this needs to be my life! How happy my family could be there, and with you to help coach my husband, I think we could actually make it. I can’t say enough how perfect of a fit this is and I am so thankful you messaged me. Your story is very moving, and you are right, everyone has a story. I want to be around people who care and who look out for each other the way you all do. I would love to talk with you more. Thank you so much :)

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